I visit the Illinois State Fair annually for one reason only – concerts – but apparently I am in the minority. Most people attend to gorge themselves on the food. While walking around the fair this year before the start of the Grandstand show, I passed all the familiar food vendors located in the same spots selling the same food to the same people. Same as it ever was, nothing out of the ordinary, just the worst fried food contributing to the poor health and eating habits of Americans for the last century. No big whoop.
Then I walked by the mini donut stand. You know, the same mini donut stand in the same location since the beginning of time, or maybe just the beginning of the state fair. I was shocked to discover something new, a clever marketing ploy to sell more donuts in fact! This year is the first I recall mini donuts being sold in BUCKETS. I was even told these “commemorative” plastic buckets were suitable for keeping and displaying in your home on a shelf, WOW! These “keepsake” plastic buckets hold 48 mini donuts. Yes, I said 48 donuts, obviously because the usual bag of 20 just-out-of-the-grease, burn-your-fingers, deep fried beauties just isn’t enough anymore.
Who could possibly need 48 mini donuts at one time? Then I looked around and saw people everywhere carrying around these BUCKETS of donuts. The marketing ploy had worked. People did feel the need to eat 48 mini donuts at one time. While watching the unflattering views of individuals walking away from me with buckets of mini donuts in hand, I wondered what might come next once the newness of the mini donut bucket wears off.
Bushel of mini donuts?
Wheelbarrow of mini donuts?
Cart of mini donuts?
I guess the mini donut madness will continue as long as state fair visitors are hell bent on total destruction by food consumption. Is this what the future holds for Americans, BUCKETS full of food to go with a GALLON of soda and SUPERSIZED fries?
I just lost my appetite.